Christmas is an opportunity to spend time with family and honor or create new traditions. Some people embrace group activities, like watching A Christmas Story on repeat, while others toil away in the kitchen, lovingly crafting a disgusting fruitcake that no one will eat. Why not make sharing laughs part of your holiday experience with these clean, kid-friendly Christmas jokes?
1. Why was the little girl so cold on Christmas?
Because it was Decembrrrr.
2. What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
3. Why do mummies like Christmas?
Because of all the wrapping.
4. How do sheep say Happy Holidays to each other?
Merry Christmas to ewe.
5. What does a Gingerbread man make his bed with?
A cookie sheet.
6. Where does the snowman keep his money?
In a snow bank.
7. What is every parent’s favorite Christmas carol?
8. What do you call Santa Claus if he goes down a lit chimney?
9. Who delivers Christmas presents to cats?
10. What do you call a greedy elf?
11. What does Santa Claus do in his garden?
Hoe, hoe, hoe.
12. Who delivers Christmas presents to dogs?
13. What do you call people with a fear of Santa Claus?
14. What falls at the North Pole but never gets injured?
15. What do monkeys sing at Christmas?
16. Who gives Christmas presents to sharks?
17. Which of Santa’s reindeer has bad manners?
18. Where do you find reindeer?
Depends on where you left them.
19. What do you give a train conductor for Christmas?
20. Why couldn’t the Christmas tree stand?
It doesn’t have legs.
21. If a reindeer loses his tail, where can he find a new one?
A retail store.
22. How do you know Santa Claus is good at karate?
He has a black belt.
23. What’s as big as Santa Claus but weighs nothing?
24. What kind of bug hates Christmas?
25. What do elves learn at school?
26. What do elves use to get to the top floor of Santa’s workshop?
27. Why did Santa’s helper feel sad?
He had low elf-esteem.
28. What is red, white, and blue during the holidays?
A sad candy cane.
29. What kind of music do elves listen to?
30. What is the best thing to put in the Christmas pie?
31. What did the duck say to the reindeer?
32. What do you call an elf wearing ear muffs?
Whatever you want. He can’t hear you anyway.
33. Why don’t lobsters celebrate Christmas?
Because they’re shellfish.
34. Knock knock
Hope you had a nice Christmas!
35. Knock knock
Orange you glad you were good all year?
36. Knock knock.
Noah good Christmas joke?
37. Knock knock.
Anna partridge in a pear tree.
38. Knock knock.
Ima dreaming of a white Christmas.
39. Knock knock.
Olive the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names…
40. Knock knock.
Doughnut open these presents until Christmas.
41. Knock knock.
Harry up and open your presents!
42. Knock knock.
Cole is not what I was expecting for Christmas this year!
43. Knock knock.
Dewey know how long it is until Santa gets here?
44. Knock knock.
Howard you like to sing Christmas carols with me?
45. Knock knock.
Yule know when you look out the door.
46. Knock knock.
Hannah partridge in a pear tree.
47. Knock knock.
Alaska Santa Claus for a new scooter.
48. Knock knock.
Justin time to deliver the Christmas gifts.
49. Knock knock.
50. Knock knock.
I’ll Alex Santa if you’re on his naughty list this year.
51. Knock knock.
Ho Ho who?
Your Santa impression needs some work.